Dirty Work (Saget, 1998)

So sue me: I think Dirty Work is the funniest movie ever made.  Rather than review this modern masterpiece, this blog post will consist entirely of quotes.  This is entirely from memory, so hopefully I get them all right.  Please feel free to correct, add, and expand as necessary (and it should be pretty necessary).

-I have to go…lift weights.

-I have a good mind to go to the warden about all of this.  Ridiculous.  You know what hurts most?  The lack of respect.  Well, no, that other thing, that hurts the most.  But the lack of respect hurts the second most.

-I’ve never seen so many dead hookers in all my life.  Lord knows I have.

-Don Giovanni?  Who’s that dude?

-First we eat the pig and then we burn!

-Wait a minute.  Are you telling me that you bet on Rocky III and you bet against Rocky?  Hindsight is 20/20 my friend.

-By the way, he’s definitely doing that dog.

-They don’t do that [whispers more].  I’ve never heard of that.

-My name’s not Mildred.  Oh, you never told me so I just guessed.

-And then remember in high-school when you slept with her?  Let’s stop reminiscing.

-Were you just peeing off the side of the roof?

-And if anything goes wrong I punch you in stomach.  Oh, that’s his department.  What?  Yeah, that’s my department.

-Rolling Stones.  Street Fighting Man.  G7!  Um, you just pushed G8.

-That’s the Saigon whore that bit my nose off!

-They say that in the land of the blind the man with one eye is king.  Well in the land of the skunks the man with no nose is king.


About dcpfilm

Shooting, teaching, writing and watching the Phillies.
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4 Responses to Dirty Work (Saget, 1998)

  1. Mike says:

    “What I don’t understand is when you owe a bookie a lot of money, and he blows off one of your toes, you still owe him the money. Doesn’t seem fair to me.”

    I completely agree with you on Dirty Work. Hilarious, oft-overlooked movie.

  2. Harry says:

    AH Dirty Work….maybe Bob Sagat’s and Norm McDonald’s best work

    How about when he is talking to the bearded lady:
    She says to him,
    -Ever do it with a chick with a beard before?
    -Can’t say I have, Bearded Broad.
    -Well then sugar, you haven’t lived.
    -Note to self, I don’t want to live.

    • dcpfilm says:

      I totally forgot about all the ‘notes to self.’ This one’s awesome, especially since he calls her Bearded Broad. How bout:

      -Note to self, get ass wart cream for giant warts on ass.

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